My Love Handles. My 3rd Chin. My Jiggles. My Happiness, Take II.

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I had writers block this week, so I scrolled through my previous posts to find something! You see, Oreofetalks is committed to posting every Thursday @12 non EST!

I cannot stress the importance of a positive self confidence. If I got my validation from people, oh, I’d be a depressed mess now. I agree, being overweight or obese is nothing to be praised. We need to work on achieving our optimal health to avoid diabetes, etc. But when you’re currently in the situation, you can’t constantly beat yourself up, ok? You listening?? Please share you the good or bad experiences that you’ve had relating weight, fat, or too skinny, in the comment section.

This is from July 2015, but it is still very valid today. Enjoy!

If you’ve had the marvelous opportunity of knowing me over the past 5 years or more, it’s no news to you that I GAINED A LOT OF WEIGHT over those years.img_0541

I was a fat 10 year old, but lost all my chunky when I was mourning in my Nigerian boarding school. It’s real – I lost 9kg (20 lbs) in 12 days! Ask my mommy, no lies here folks, lol. I remember putting on my jean skirt my first break from school. AFTER zipping
it up, it fell to the ground. Over my 6 years of boarding school, I’d gain weight during holidays > 3 weeks, and shed it all off once I got back to school.

Exercise is VITAL. I get it, but if I’m to be honest with you, I’ll tell you that I’m not that committed to it. I think the most I’ve regularly exercised has been 5 consecutive weeks. Anyways, I moved to America June 2010.
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Let’s Discuss: Our Five Love Languages

5ll A few years ago, a friend introduced me to a book, ‘5 love languages.’ The summary of this book is that, each individual has a unique love language—words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, or physical touch—that best fills their love. It encourages couples to share their discovered love language with their significant other (S.O), so that they can be loved the way they need to be loved. You can see more on the love languages here.

It’s always been tough for me to rank my love languages because, at one point or the other, I need each one of these love languages from my S.O, if not all. A few weeks ago, a friend, my younger brother, Demi, and I were discussing these love languages. As we went through the meaning of each, my list kept changing. Earlier this week, Demi shoots me a message of his thoughts on the matter. After reading it, I thoughy, ‘YESSSS!! My love languages are all the love languages, and I hope and pray that with adequate communication, mutual understanding, and genuine love for one another, my, and your S.O would be able to love us the way we need to be loved, in the different moments of life.’

Demi’s Expose (with my edits) – 5 Love Languages
My! I was thinking last night. Love languages should not be discussed; they should be discovered. If your tell your S.O asks that your love language is ‘acts of service,’ the next day, he’she takes your dirty car for a deep clean. You will be super excited right? Yes, I would be too.  Continue reading

Turning Cancerous Lemons to Yummy Lemonades

 

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L – R: Oreofe, Danielle, Aaleyah

A few months ago, I shared here that one of my favorite girls, Aaleyah was diagnosed with Medullary Thyroid Carcinoma, a neuroendocrine cancer. She has good days, and bad days, but ultimately, she is taking this journey like a champion, and giving light and love to all her family and friends through this journey. She inspired her friend, Danielle, owner of dellectables, to start a table talk series which happens in an interview format, but for a blog. This interview was done last Friday, before the successful completion of Aaleyah’s thyroid removal on Monday, thank you, Jesus! I invite you to see how a 22 year old chick, who got what seems like life’s sourest lemons, has turned it into lemonades.

 

After reading their conversation, I gained so much. I saw the love of family, the importance in picking the right friends, and the determination to always choose life, no matter what life brings. As Danielle said, “I don’t know what you will take from it, but I hope that you can at least take one thing, that whatever life throws at you it’s never the end and you can make the best of what you’re given.

Here’s a piece of HERstory…


Danielle: How are you today?
Aaleyah: I’m great, how are you?

I’m doing good, trying to make some lemonade.
Lemonade or tea (laughs)?

Hmm… tea because you know it cures it all, and add some lemon.
(Laughs) I’ll just channel Beyoncé and make some lemonade in my life.

(Laughs) You’ve been doing a great job at it.
Thank you! I really appreciate that.

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Show me the Love you Profess

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Pic credit: Casedekarma

If I’m ever in a bizarre situation, where I can only have one book of the Bible with me, I’d pick Romans. It’s my favorite book!

I am currently running an initiative to raise money for a person I care so deeply about, who has an incredible story. Please look on my social media for the story, or reach out to me if you would like to know the details, and give, as I cannot put it on my blog because it’s a surprise, and I can’t control who sees my posts!

This initiative has taken up all my thinking time this week. I have experienced generosity that moved me to tears. I also experienced the opposite end of generosity. I’ve received so much encouragement and blessings from doing this. But I’ve also received some critic. Overall, I have enjoyed doing this, and it has shifted my perspective on various things! Since I’m in a place of meditation, i will carry you along on that journey.

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Sex, Purity, and Christianity

FullSizeRender Is there an age when it’s understood that you can no longer wait? What should we do with ourselves when we get horny? (Yes, virgins, or the holiest people get horny too). Is the emphasis on sex too much? Why do people want to give virgins a medal, but no one is giving a medal to someone who isn’t a glutton? According to the bible, these are both sins. Is it because of the possible soul ties created during sex?  In the bible days, waiting was easier because they got married almost after the girls started their menstruation. Today, the average age of marriage is 27 for women, and 29 for men.
These are some questions that have been heavy on my mind lately. I don’t have the answers to them, but some of my fav gals have so generously shared a large part of their journey. The answers I am sharing are from young ladies, so again, I don’t know about older single women, say age 30+, but God help us all! I was really blessed by their responses, and so thankful that I have a rich poll of loved ones.

Grace: Engaged, getting married @23.
Me: I’m sure this is a private for you and bae, but as a Christian dating, how possible is it to remain pure? How far becomes too far? How do you draw the line on your passion? I’m struggling with this, and I’m not even committed to one person, yet… so I’m just really curious. Can this be achieved?
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Will you be my Reliable Friend?

oreofe1-42I love people! Maybe once a month, I surprise myself and want to be quiet, lol! But I always want to know that someone is there for me. Physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually.

I have encountered various types of friendships throughout my life, and I try my bets to be a good friend.
Here are some qualities I have come to treasure in my friendships. Big Disclaimer: NO ONE CAN POSSESS ALL OF THESE THINGS!

LOVE – As imperfect, sometimes complicated, maybe indecisive, short tempered, or whatever anyone is, a friend will love you. You will feel this love through your being, and you will be thankful for it, always.

TRUSTWORTHY – Do you understand that there are some things that your friend has chosen to share with only you? Will those things ever come back to him/her? Can your friend truly  and fully trust you?

HUMOR – If you ain’t gonna laugh with me, goodbye. Ok, not that literally…but we all enjoy a good laugh and want to share those moments with people who see and appreciate humor. Continue reading

What we All Need From Relationships

img_0165Relationships – family, friendships, sisterhoods, bromance, BFF’s etc., are vital to every individual. No man is an island. We all need people. We need a support system. We need encouragers. We need destiny helpers. Of all these people we need, the most important one is the person we choose to commit the rest of our lives to. This decision affects every aspect of one’s life! Many people find the topic of marriage scary, and rightly should. Marriage is a hit or miss. I have seen both situations play out, and because of this, I will do my best to make sure I don’t make a mistake in choosing who I spend the rest of my life with.

Last summer, I talked with my Grandpa, who was 83 years old at the time, and was happily married for 50 years before my Grandma went to rest with Jesus. He shared 8 things to study for in a partner before marriage. I will be gracious enough to share it with you all.

  1. Sign from God – When you see the person, ask God to let you know it’s him/her. Ensure that it’s Gods choice for you. He saw my grandma in a dream, with the number of children they went on to have. Get a sign. We spiricoco’s call it conviction.
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