I’ve never been one to seek out deeper meanings behind why things happen. The way I see things, they happen because they’re meant to happen, because God wants them to happen. The real reasoning will somehow become apparent when it’s supposed to. I’ve found it the last few weeks, however, that sometimes you should see situations for the wake up call they are. You should actively make the choice to acknowledge your situation then consciously decide how you will allow it to affect you.
I know this all sounds hypothetical and generalized so let me give you an example. It’s Wednesday evening, around five o’clock and I’m about to head out to this concert I’ve been looking forward to for months. Out of the blues, I get a very shady text message from my supposed friend. I’m not one to text and drive, so I stand by my house rapidly texting with her back and forth. Rather than antagonizing the situation further, I calmly and respectfully explain to her that when there is a problem, as friends, we should be able to discuss and resolve it without being nasty towards each other.
After twenty minutes or so, this ‘friend’ seemed to calm down and the issue was resolved. I got in my car and proceeded to drive to the concert. On this drive, I thought about what just transpired. Why would someone I’m friends with come at me like that? This was not the first time she had come at me like this. Every time this has happened, I’ve been the adult and tried to work the problem. Why do I continue to let this person’s negativity and drama ruin my mood, peace of mind, and excitement for this concert I’m driving to? All this while I’m driving feeling severely tense. Then, the car in front of me stops, so I stop. BAM! This black battering ram in the shape of an Audi A4 slams straight into the back of me.
My ears were ringing. My vision went blurry. My heart was pounding. It took me a several seconds to remember how to breathe. I called 911 and got out to see the other driver. The driver is this teenage girl who looks terrified of me, despite being the one that hit me. She has tears in her eyes. The irony is she was texting a friend. She said they were having a fight. I had to laugh. I said, “I doubt it’s worth your life. You gotta end the argument before you leave or after you get somewhere girl.” I didn’t think much of it at the time. I just wanted to get to my concert, which I did! The following week, once again I got a crazy message from my friend at 8 o’clock in the morning, this time. I couldn’t even respond. I laid back in my bed, closed my eyes and the memory of that car running into me played repeatedly. Every replay I got more and more sure God was trying to tell me something.
I ignored this feeling for two days and continued to enjoy the vacation I happened to be on. Arriving home after the drive back, something in my spirit told me that I couldn’t bring this energy into my house. I could no longer allow this person to hit me from behind over and over again. Maybe I’ve read too many Nicholas Sparks movies but it’s always been in me to always fight for your friends and the people that matter. However, there’s also a saying in some Tyler Perry play basically saying that when people want to walk out of your life you have to let them. I’m not saying that friend chose to walk out but it got to a point where it was clear it was time for a pink slip. And what do you know, she didn’t even fight for the friendship. The thing is sometimes life puts you in situations that will to get out of your head and examine your spirit. That’s what I had to learn. There’s been grief in the loss for sure, but there has also been this overwhelming sense of relief and joy.
Author: Jazmine James
I have another submitted post this week, and I really enjoyed it! Please refer to my post on friendships to see how to better evaluate your relationships! I’ll catch you next week, same place, same time. Something fun I like to say, ‘it’s 2017. Ain’t nobody got time for fake relationships!