I Like You… I Want You… Why’re We Playing?

 

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Credit: Buzzfeed.com

Uh, y’all! Ever like someone so much that you get mad at yourself for liking them that much? That was the case with Aisha. She met Emeka on an evening where she was not expecting any special treat. She met him in the very place where she wrote off all the men that walked through the doors. When she glanced at him, she thought, “Oh, looking at him is quite nice on my eyes.” The two talked for a while after the meeting, and exchanged numbers. Aisha was transported to the magical place, called cloud 9. Aisha drove home that night praying, wishing, hoping, dreaming that by some miraculous ways, Emeka and her will end up together…forever.

When Aisha got home to her family, she was able to completely lose her mind… She screamed, jumped, yelled, and as a true Nigerian, she said, “I have seen my husband oo! I’m so excited!” Maybe the typical Western woman would have sent Emeka a text…but no, that’s a taboo for an African woman. As much as Aisha liked Emeka, she shared her feelings of her new crush to everyone, but the crush.

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Credit: zineinfo.com

Two days after, no word from Emeka. Aisha talked to God about it, but wanting her future husband to pursue her, she did not initiate any conversation. A friendly café trip later, Emeka told Aisha that she was a blessing to his life. His life. Aisha was a blessing to Emeka’s life. Yes, yes… Doesn’t sound like a big deal. But as short as the text was, Aisha translated it as;
“In the few short days that I’ve known you Aisha, I’ve thought about you so much. I’m praying to God to give me the green light to ask you out to be my girlfriend. So far, you’ve been a blessing to me. I cannot wait to see how we grow strong together.” A very drastic translation, but definitely not to Aisha. Emeka was just too lazy to type all that out, and she had to help him complete his thoughts.

They talked maybe twice a week for 2 weeks, and Aisha started questioning those feelings that once set her mind and body on fire. The questioning came from Emeka seeming a little unstable, a little nonchalant, a little uninterested… Everything in little bits. Her heart sunk, she deleted the few nice texts exchanged, so as not to re-read them a thousand times and get strung up on what could have been. Maybe even, what should be. Emeka is certainly a good guy. He possesses a lot of qualities a decent, Christian, fun Aisha wants in a man… but he’s playing.

As humans, why are we so protective of our feelings? Why can’t we freely express love to those we care deeply about? Why is it always awkward in the first phases of getting to know someone? What are we protecting? Where has our vulnerability gone? How does Aisha subtly pass the message to Emeka that she wants more? Is Emeka deliberately pushing away his feelings? Why are relationships so complicated? Why? Why? Why?

Is love really this hard to find…and/ or share?
Please leave your comments and share your experiences that will help all the Aisha’s and Emeka’s out there are they fumble around the somewhat painful foundation of starting a relationship. Remember to like this post if you like it, subscribe to the blog… so you never miss a post, and follow oreofetalks on all social media platforms.

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7 thoughts on “I Like You… I Want You… Why’re We Playing?

  1. Aww poor Aisha 😢😢😥
    She is just a typical example of an average lady.. You know some stereotyped thoughts when you see a handsome guy.
    i believe some mentalities are just going to remain if we don’t work on ourselves.
    Be friends and don’t look into the aspect of any serious relationship at first sight, but you know once the right guy comes, Mehn those senses naturally click😉😉

    Like

  2. Nice one!
    Just as the story implies, “Love is complicated”.
    Following the way Aisha and Emeka met, they truly can be married, that may truly be there destiny. But “love is complicated”
    Emeka probably felt the same way as Aisha but on the other hand, Emeka has been through that path several times unfortunately, he may be tired of that same looking good moment, he may not want to keep telling the same story.
    Aisha is right that Emeka should go after her, Unfortunately, Emeka doesn’t think it works anymore but Aisha does not know because they haven’t talk about the experience.
    This bring me to equality, man or woman, we have equal right as far as our goals, right, emotions etc
    Emeka is not less than the man Aisha saw but the timing was wrong, its possible Emeka need Aisha more than she needs him in order to regain his confident that there is a real Aisha.
    We all need each other at some point in life, it doesn’t matter who come first.

    Like

  3. Ha! There is more perceived depth.
    I will tell you all something. And this is how I feel right now.

    Stop being deep. Humans are already complex.

    When I met my husband, we met. I didn’t have a relationship in my head or dead conversation. I had it with him.
    I can honestly say I have never!
    So I have received proposals that weren’t for me.

    I am not a babe. On the contrary I’m comfortable and proud. I would wear what the hell I like from my cotton briefs to my rough braids. I don’t look at the most expensive or recent. Some (most) of my clothes are thrift or sale. If you’re luck you met me on the 5 times in my life I shaved my legs.
    But…
    Men like you, they see you but they marry me.
    I am honest.

    You see the problem is some not all women have a plan and want to manoeuvre life and God.
    They live saying the right thing, behaving the right way suppressing their nature to fit their perception of their surroundings.
    In essence they be like someone they clearly are not.
    Put bluntly and sharply.
    If that girl liked that boy those guards would have dropped.
    She likes the idea of him.

    Till she has the confidence in who she is.

    The whole her. She will continue to meet guys she thinks she should marry and they will continue to meet women they do.

    Liberate yourself. Be who you are. Laugh when no one else is laughing. Cry when the feeling takes you, where the feeling takes you. And most of all…
    Do what pleases you.
    Whilst you’re busy doing all that you’ll meet the right guy. When you meet him doing all that you will be open. And when you’re open he too is open.

    P’S. Some men will tell you everything you want to hear and behave in the box of what’s right. Yup the one we created.
    Till they get what they want from you. You won’t even notice till they run you out.
    Why?
    Because when you’re busy having the fake conversations the added extras. He is busy showing you who he is and you just don’t want to see it.
    It’s called a DELUSION.
    A delusion requires energy so you sex him, buy him things, run around like a wife to keep him happy. He sure is HAPPY.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ha! A very interesting and dynamic perspective.
      Does this imply that anything that Aisha thinks should be shared? Does your definition of confidence mean that Aisha should be ok with getting turned down if she chooses to proclaim her feelings?

      Like

  4. Ha! There is more perceived depth.
    I will tell you all something. And this is how I feel right now.

    Stop being deep. Humans are already complex.

    When I met my husband, we met. I didn’t have a relationship in my head or dead conversation. I had it with him.
    I can honestly say I have never been a girl to appreciate the final chapter in a book but I enjoy the whole story, so I never rush ahead and try not to dictate the next paragraph or read ahead. I laugh loudly, go out by myself and dance alone.
    So it will shock you that I have received proposals that weren’t for me (x3 and 2 times from an ex.) . More so than my reserved friends.

    I am not a babe. On the contrary I’m comfortable and proud. I would wear what the hell I like from my cotton briefs to my rough braids. I don’t look at the most expensive or recent. Some (most) of my clothes are thrift or sale. If you’re lucky you met me on the 5 times in my life I shaved my legs. I’m not hippy chic or chic anything I’m me.
    But…
    Men like you, they see you they want to approach you, they talk to you, but they marry me.

    I am honest about me.

    You see the problem is some not all women have a plan and want to manoeuvre life and God.
    They live saying the right thing, behaving the right way suppressing their nature to fit their perception of their surroundings.
    In essence they be like someone they clearly are not.
    Put bluntly and sharply.
    If that girl liked that boy those guards would have dropped.
    She likes the idea of him.

    Till she has the confidence in who she is.

    The whole her. She will continue to meet guys she thinks she should marry and they will continue to meet women they do.

    Liberate yourself. Be who you are. Laugh when no one else is laughing. Cry when the feeling takes you, where the feeling takes you. And most of all…
    Do what pleases you.
    Whilst you’re busy doing all that you’ll meet the right guy. When you meet him doing all that you will be open. And when you’re open he too is open.

    P’S. Some men will tell you everything you want to hear and behave in the box of what’s right. Yup the one we created.
    Till they get what they want from you. You won’t even notice till they run you out. You would be too tightly wound to see.
    Why?
    Because when you’re busy having the fake conversations the added extras. He is busy showing you who he is and you just don’t want to see it.
    It’s called a DELUSION.
    A delusion requires energy so you sex him, buy him things, run around like a wife to keep him happy. He sure is HAPPY.

    Like

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